Wednesday, November 16, 2011

"We" The People

It's the little things in life that annoy me. Take for instance a really, really small word; "we"! It's misused and butchered in so many ways. For example in referring to your local sports franchise as "we". Like "we should have won that game". Right, if only the coach had called your number! Or when you see your doctor and he asks "so, how are we doing today"? Well doc while I can't speak for "we", "I" have a rash on "my" ass, wanna see it? But the most annoying, pretentious use is when someone uses "we" (by definition referring to more then one person) in the singular and referring to someone else, not themselves. For example a mother and daughter go to buy shoes and the mother tells the salesperson "we'd like to try on some shoes". Um, OK, can you be anymore opaque? Be "we" you mean both of you, right? Or do you mean just you? Or just her? Honestly, how stupid a use of a word is this? Well it's completely incorrect use of the word for sure. And yet it's used over, and over and over

So, why is it misused? Are people stupid? Maybe. I think typically it's misused by control freak wannabe alphas who think they are so important they need to speak for all around them henceforth he or she speaks for "we". Could you be a little more self important? I can sniff these dill holes a mile away and like to mess around with them ('cause that's what "we", meaning "me" like to do). At my job (if you don't know already I'm in the wonderful world of retail) I'll have group walk in and when I ask if I can help them I get a "we'd like to try on some skates". Now I KNOW they mean for a single member of their party who is not him or herself but hey I'm a prick so I'll say "sure, why don't we start with you" to wit I almost always get a "no, no, for my son/daughter/wife/husband/friend" and I'll say "Oh, when you said we...." with a dazed look on my face. Sure it's petty and juvenile but it' the little things that help me get though the day. Besides, I'm so freakin smooth they have no clue and by the time I dazzle them they think they've made a new best friend!!

Anyhoooo. Is there a reason for this rant? No. Just something I get annoyed with so I thought I'd share it with you. But please people, "we" is the first person plural (meaning more then one) personal pronoun (try saying that 5 times fast) and should be used as such. The described usage above is known as the patronizing "we" and a more descriptive term could not be found!